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'My mother-in-law wants to change my son's name and has stopped using it'


A mum has fallen out with her daughter and son-in-law after refusing to call her grandson by the correct name.

Choosing the perfect name for your newborn is a tough decision – and not everyone is happy.

But one couple are facing stress from their son’s grandmother – who wants to change his middle name as a compromise.

Taking to Reddit, the woman’s husband explained that his mother-in-law wanted to name the baby ‘Sherman’.

But the couple eventually decided to name their son ‘Alexander’ – which she didn’t like.

Now they are divided over the issue – with the man turning to the internet for advice.

“Me (~30M) and my wife (~30F) recently had a baby. Over the past 3 months, her mother (~60F) has been a constant presence in helping us around the house, the anonymous man wrote.



Woman standing in front of a chalkboard filled with potential baby names
The mother-in-law doesn’t like the name

“It has been very helpful, and we have been very thankful, especially as my wife had a long recovery due to some complications.

“Her mother has always wanted us to name the baby “Sherman” to honor her father.

“Quite simply, we just didn’t like the name, and so we declined and ultimately named him “Alexander”.

“However, over the last couple of weeks I have noticed her increasingly calling him variations of “Sherman” (e.g., Lil Sherm)… to him and to us.

“I have asked her gently and firmly to stop doing so. My wife has talked to her also. No change.

“A few days ago, I made a big deal out of it. Talked about how disrespecful it was, how if she wasn’t willing to call him his real name, she could leave. She did.

“You can check my post history where I gave a more detailed writeup.



The husband asked his mother-in-law to leave the house

“Since then, cooler heads have prevailed. We had a Zoom conversation where I apologized for the outburst.

“I however, did not apologize for insisting for her to call him the right name. She did not apologize for not calling him the right name.

“Instead, she came with a compromise. That we give him the middle name “Sherman”.

“‘How many more years do I have left’ she said. I was outright against this idea, but my wife told her we’d think about.

“The wife and I have talked about it since – her stance is while she doesn’t like it, she doesn’t want to rock the boat.

“I know her mother has been guilting her in the past few days. She also feels like her mother always ends up doing what she wants. I want to stand firm.

“
So… my question is really – should I say yes or no?”

Reddit users were quick to give their own opinions, with many urging the couple to not change their son’s name.

They wrote: “This is insanity. If the name was very special to your wife I’d suggest using it as a second middle name. In this situation absolutely not!

“It will not only be an ugly addition to your son’s name but it will give grandma the legitimization of her bad behavior. She will call him Sherman because it’s “his name”.

Another said: “I’m usually a fan of compromise and each party giving a little – but, this is the name of YOUR son and this issue isn’t with your SO, it’s with your MIL … she needs to stop, and grow up.”

A third agreed, adding: “By compromising you’re enabling her toxic entitlement. She openly disrespects your wishes and parenting role.”

What do you think the couple should do? Let us know in the comments below.





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