How to tell which ministers want to flounce out of today's crunch Chequers summit

All the speculation about the Chequers Cabinet summit today is over which ministers will flounce out with the smart money on Boris Johnson.

So here’s your guide to flouncing so you can be ahead of the game.

Choosing the PM’s Buckinghamshire country retreat instead of No10 was a masterstroke by the PM.

Flouncing out of No10 is a simple business.

You tell Mrs May you’re quitting, bowl out of the famous black door, and within seconds you’re in the London streets.

Flouncing out of No10 is a simple business. But Chequers has a long drive

Chequers is 40 miles away from the capital, and potential flouncers have been told they won’t be allowed to use their ministerial cars to take them there if they resign.

Legging it is not much of an option either.

Chequers has a long drive, a very long one. It is not designed for flouncing.

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Chequers Brexit summit

You will get to the end of it drenched in sweat and feeling thoroughly humiliated.

And then, still dripping away, you must wait for a taxi.

Who wouldn’t be afraid of this table?

In the shadow of the Chiltern Hills nestles the Prime Minister's residence Chequers
Escapees will get to the gate drenched in sweat and feeling thoroughly humiliated

But if you have forgotten to take a card for the local Aston’s Taxis cab firm, helpfully placed on the Chequers sideboard for such eventualities, you must walk all the way back up the drive again to get one.

International Trade Secretary Liam Fox is now off the PM’s flouncing list, as was Environment Secretary Michael Gove last night and then back on it this morning.

You can never tell with the Gover as he is adept at changing sides at the last minute.

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Boris is still deemed to be “at risk”, and Brexit Secretary David Davis would love the opportunity for a good flounce.

So how can you tell which ministers are thinking of flouncing?

They’ll be the ones who drove to Chequers this morning in their own cars.


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