lifestyle

How to stop rejections destroying your confidence when you’re job hunting


The job hunting process can be a bit soul destroying – but keep at it (Picture: Getty/Metro.co.uk)

You’ve nailed your cover letter, your CV is on point, and you’re firing off applications left and right.

But just as you feel like you’re hitting your job-hunting stride, it happens: you’re turned down for a job.

Then another rejection comes. And another.

You’re not quite right for this role, your qualifications aren’t what they’re looking for, you’re good, but there’s a lot of competition.

It’s hard to not let this destroy your soul a bit.

Rejections are part and parcel of searching for a job. So how can we prevent them from completely wrecking our confidence and motivation? How do we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and keep going, knockback after knockback?

We chatted with Yetunde Hofmann, a leadership coach, mentor, and the founder of SOLARIS, for her top tips.

Remember it’s a numbers game

‘When I started out on my career journey, I went through more than 100 company job hiring processes and received rejection after rejection,’ Yetunde tells Metro.co.uk. ‘It felt like I was never ever going to land a job and one that would be right for me.

‘I got rejections even from the companies that I knew I would be making a compromise on my wishes by joining.

‘I would burst into tears as I read the news and feel low for hours and then I would dust myself down, pick myself up and write the next applications or prepare for the next interview.

‘Keep going. Apply for as many jobs that meet your criteria/most of your criteria as possible. Learn from each opportunity.

‘Keep going and your breakthrough will come.’

Ask for feedback

After the latest rejection from a job you thought you were perfect for, it’s hard not to spiral.

What’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you getting any offers? What are you missing?

Not knowing makes this worse so, as uncomfortable as it may be, it’s well worth asking for feedback from companies who have turned you down.

‘Understanding the reason why you receive a rejection can provide valuable insight into what you can do next time around to increase the likelihood of your progressing further in the process,’ says Yetunde.

Accept that this process is going to get stressful (Picture: Getty Images)

Don’t let feedback knock you down

You asked for feedback and it stung. Don’t stew in this for too long.

‘There is always the risk that when you ask for feedback following a rejection, it may be about something you are either unable to change about yourself or that you think they have completely misread about you,’ Yetunde notes.

‘This is the time to remind yourself of your talent and capabilities and that also you are not the feedback.

‘It is simply information that has been shared with you because you asked and information that you can choose to keep and use or dispose.’

Remember you are not alone

Yetunde says: ‘For every job that is advertised, there will be many people applying for it.

‘You also will not be the only person called for the first interview and at the end of the process, only one person or a handful, depending on the number of vacancies they have, will get an offer.

‘So, you can draw comfort from this and do your best to resist taking rejection along the way personally.

‘You are not the only one and one day that one person who gets the call with a smiling voice and a job offer will be you.’

Lean on friends

Searching for a new job is tough. Don’t struggle on alone.

‘Make sure that you have some friends with whom you can be yourself and share your innermost worries and hopes with,’ Yetunde tells us. ‘These are the friends who will keep you real, be your cheerleaders when you win and take you out for a change of scenery when needed. They are the ones that will sit in the victim corner with you for a little while and give you the loving boot to get you back on your feet and trying again.’

Try to stay positive (Picture: Getty Images)

Keep note of the good stuff

Yetunde recommends keeping a gratitude journal as a way to ‘remind yourself of all the good things that are happening in your life no matter how distraught you may feel in the moment’.

We’d add a success journal- or even just a folder on your computer, to that, too. Keep note of all the times you’ve done great things, any good feedback you get, any positive outcomes of work you’ve done – then look back at all this evidence the next time job rejections are making you feel like you’re rubbish at everything.

Start doing positive affirmations

The moment you’re searching for a job, it’s time to be proactive about your mental wellbeing. Acknowledge that this process is stressful and can dent your self-esteem, and take steps to counteract this.

‘Write a set of positive affirmations that are simple and easy to remember or access,’ suggests Yetunde. ‘Read them daily, practice them regularly, and remind yourself to read them after each interview stage, regardless of the outcome.

‘The more you read your positive affirmations the easier it will be to challenge any negative thoughts and unnecessary self-criticism that you may have.’

Prioritise self-acceptance

Yetunde says: ‘Remember that you are a human being and are not perfect and neither are any of the human beings you meet along the way on your job hunting journey. It is therefore important to be accepting of who you are – warts and all – without condition.

‘When you come from a place of self-acceptance it makes it easier for you to accept others for who they are too. It will make it easier for you to bounce back, to forgive more easily as you will need to in the face of rejection, and to be more embracing of any clumsiness you experience along the way – whether that clumsiness is yours or the other person’s.’

Yetunde Hofmann is a board level executive leadership coach and mentor, global change, inclusion and diversity expert, author of Beyond Engagement and founder of SOLARIS – a pioneering new leadership development programme for black women.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.


MORE : Common causes of workplace stress – and how to deal with them


MORE : What should workplaces do to help people going through menopause?


MORE : How to deal with irritating co-workers now office life is resuming





READ SOURCE

Leave a Reply

This website uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you accept our use of cookies.  Learn more